Saturday, April 5, 2008
I suppose I'll never know. I Suppose it doesn't matter. The past is the past. What's done is done. No matter how hard you try, wish, and dream there's no changing things now. All you can do is wake up the next morning and hope for the best.
I must not be very talented at hoping.
They say it's a long way from happiness. For some it is no way to happiness. Happiness is something people will spend years, their whole lives searching for. Sadly, some never find it. But they will certainly die trying. But what choice do we really have? In a lifetime one has to do something until his or her day of judgement. Everyone dies eventually.
In fact, we're really all dying now. And dying with each passing moment. From the day each and everyone of us were born into this world the clock started ticking. Counting down to zero. Counting down to that day of death. Perhaps, counting down to that day of freedom. The amount of time we start with varies from indvidual to individual. No one knows their time, or their time left for that matter.
Someone once said: "Dream as if you'll live forever. Live as if you'll die tomorrow"
Inspiring words indeed.
But that someone never considered that for some of us, the last three words of the first sentence of this quote is our worst nightmare-simply because the last three words of the second sentence is our dream.
It is now 3:49 AM, perhaps at this time my mind-set is not where it should be. But as I gaze out my 10th-story window and into the night, I can only realize this:
It's a long way to happiness-and the clock just can't tick fast enough.
Thursday, March 13, 2008
Time. It is an ongoing news magazine that has been in publication for God knows how long. It is the three or four-digit number that one reads off his or her digital clock and possibly with that reading will freeze, and say:"Oh Fuck. Late again!" It is the independent variable of a variety of mathematical functions in the science of physics. It is the sole factor that we all live our day-to-day lives around.
But, perhaps more than anything, time is never-ending. It is always moving forward and never stops for anything, anyone, or for any reason. Taking my curiosity, however, is where does time go? After taking my share of physics courses, I have learned that we can measure time in seconds, minutes, hours, days, weeks, months, years, and almost any other metric-system prefix one would want to tack on to these commonly known words. But more than anything, I now find myself forgetting the difference in magnitude between these units. The years now seem like months, the months like days, the days like hours and the hours like minutes... You get the point. As time moves forward, it always seems to accelerate more and more.
I wish it wouldn't.
They say life is short. I suppose just how short it is all depends on one's own interpretation of time. Regardless, the changes governed by time are inevitable. One can look back on his or her life and reflect on a virtually endless stream of events. The first time you tasted ice cream. Your
first day of school. First girlfriend, first boyfriend. The birth of a loved one, the death of loved one. Friends made, friends lost.
One day we are all going to have to step up, face the music, and ask oursleves: are making the most of our time or not? Or: have we made the most of our time? If i were you, I would not expect an answer-you are your own worst enemy afterall.
Sooner or later, the what becomes why, here becomes there, passion becomes pity, and everything becomes nothing. Finally you've just realized that time has blazed a trail and left you in its dust. Like I asked before and as the old saying goes: "Where does the time go?"
Once the dust settles, many of us will finally begin to see the light at the end of the tunnel. Perhaps this is where time goes, at this light is where time seemingly taunts us from. Perhaps this is where the answers we've spent a lifetime searching for are kept.
Unfortunately, once the dust settles, some of us will still be struggling to find the tunnel.